I’m afraid our furry companion has gone and done something rather rash

We moved here 8 years ago so I could accept a job I’d been recruited for, leading the development of some new ideas inside a staid industrial automation company. Those who’d put me up for it had talked me up (somewhat undeservedly) as an “expert”, so I took the role with a level of authority and autonomy I hadn’t had before. I was expected to do things differently, and for awhile, I could. When my boss and I had an approved plan, they let me hand-pick my team to execute it. It was the most fun I’d had to that point in my career: every single person I worked with was a rock star, and we were building something we were passionate and excited about. Eventually, I ran out of rope, the effort ran out of support, and those who’d recruited me had moved on. But we made some things happen, and we had a blast doing it. Last week, some of the crew got together for a drink…

I made it 4 years — one of the longer stints in my career — before moving on to my current gig. We’re a focused institute inside a major University, and while we benefit from their resources and reputation, we are subject to their processes, which are primarily focused around academia and research. Its not a perfect fit, but overall, it works most of the time. As usual, I’m less of a fit than some others — and while I have a mandate from my immediate leaders that allows me and my team some autonomy, the organization that surrounds us feels some friction.

Having been in this position another 4 years, I knew it was time for a change — but there hasn’t been the feeling of accomplishment or closure yet: there’s still more to do… we just need to find new ways to do it (or, maybe more accurately, I need to.)

So last week, I quit — sort of. I mean, I handed in my two weeks notice, with full intent to vacate my spot. But I’ve been helping some friends with their businesses, and will be joining one of them. Together, we’ve bid on a RFP that requires my kind of contribution, and if all goes well, through that vehicle I’ll be re-joining my previous organization as a contract resource. I’ll be able to contribute to their mission, which is a worthwhile one, but also have some freedom (and some hours in a week) to self-direct my efforts towards complimentary projects and innovations.

There’s some risk, of course. I’ll have to periodically bid on, and compete for, my contract position. We’ll have to handle some of the things an employer usually does — like tax withholding, and health insurance plans. But we’ll also have our own business, that can furnish some deductions, provide diversity of income and experiences, and create a new set of growth challenges to keep things interesting.

This has not been a reckless leap into the unknown. Since we got our green cards we’ve been working toward a new arrangement. Nicole has embarked on a soft relaunch of her career, working part time for the school board, and we’ve both been helping advise and administrate for other organizations on a volunteer basis. My leadership team, too, has bent over backward to help with the transition and ensure our working relationship can continue in new forms. At work, my team has stepped up in new ways to backfill some of my duties. And financially, we’ve been deferring my income for the last few months, storing up funds to buffer any hard times.

I’d like to say I’m 100% confident this is the right move — but I’ve never been 100% confident of any move. I do know that we’ve laid this before the Lord, and tried to remain sensitive to His leading. I also know that I’ve spent most of my life impatient and impetuous — with more than a reasonable share of arrogance — and that my only hope is that God redeems these undesirable qualities and uses them somehow for good.

Its a weird time to be trying something like this. Inflation isn’t under control, markets are in flux, and interest rates are insane. But we’re debt free, save for the mortgage (which is locked in at an amazing rate), the kids have reached an age where they need us a little less, and we live in a place that is relatively safe and stable. We’ve had 20+ years to develop the skills we need to manage and execute a business, and we’re young and healthy enough to recover if things don’t work out. The variables are as good as they’re going to get, and the challenge feels daunting, but achievable — which is my favorite kind of challenge.

The next 8-12 months should be interesting ones. If you’re the praying type, we’d appreciate it if you keep us in mind. We may not know what the future holds, but God does, so as we have many times before, we’re stepping out, and trusting Him to guide our steps.